It seems as though lately the sermons I hear, the blurbs on the radio or the stuff I read all remind me of the LIFE that we are so rich in in Christ and the WORD of the Lord that is so necessary to our deep and personal growth, our joy (notice I didn't say happiness) and our peace...just to name a few things. I have rediscovered a long lost website that I just fell in love with last year but through the change of browsers had lost the book mark and forgot about it. This blog has reminded me of many things but mainly that I have a purpose and a plan. If you love a good read and a wonderful rich story go to:
http://www.melodyross.typepad.com/
I love Melody's heart and am so happy to find her website again after such a long absence.
As for my own story? I have been pondering "hosting" a bible study for awhile now and have had it in my heart to teach for even longer but have just not been sure what to DO about it! Several things have happened in this last month to give me a lot to chew on and really begin asking the Lord what HE wants....
1. I heard Jeremy Camp share on the radio some time ago that, while thinking about his latest album's songs and writing them, he was asking what he could write that people would like and the Lord said to him, Jeremy don't worry about what pleases others, write songs that will please me... hmmmmm....now that got a few of my brain juices flowing in the right direction..
2. A month ago John and I went to see Mike and Nancy and, sitting around the table one afternoon before we left for home, we started talking about "THE PLAN" for our lives. I mean, does God really have a "master" plan for us and how does it all work? Mike suggested to us that maybe, just maybe the Lord says, "its not about the plan, its about relationships" and more importantly? "What do YOU want to do?" WOW! I have been thinking about that ever since he proposed that train of thought to me. Its not an entirely new idea to me but put the way he did? It opened my eyes up to another way of looking at the Lord. If I have ever gotten tied up with theology it is with the concept of our participation in a master plan and if there is such a thing then why bother praying? I think that this whole question the Lord is asking, what do you want to do Lucy? is extremely profound right now!
3. After starting to read Melody's blog, particularly about stepping out of ones comfort zone, being brave and asking what do I want to do (wow, that question again) something has been stirring in me, more and more. Last night I was standing in our kitchen cutting up veggies for stir fry. The guys were all laughing and playing a computer game so I was basically alone in the kitchen, no one talking to me. I had been scrapping for a few hours so my mind was just kind of floating along a little creative wave and this thought came to me. Lucy, you could start doing a bible study on your blog...WHAT LORD? Are you kidding? Thats not all that innovative or original! (please pardon my rudeness to the Lord, thank goodness He is so able to handle my insecure honesty) But as I stood there and tried to argue with Him I felt Him smile and felt this nudge to just "do" it! It goes back to number one, Jeremy Camp...okay Lord, I get it, this isn't about me and or even IF anyone reads it, its about you and me just stepping out of my comfort zone isn't it? You see, I have been burned a few times by being real and am still walking in this really painful place of misconceptions and misunderstandings about me and any intentions I may have. Having dealt with things that have to do with THOSE things I believe at this point I have done what I can to repair damage but the insecurity and heartache of unacceptance are still active in me...hence the Lord talking to me about moving!
4. Today I was cleaning one of my houses and working away not really noticing the out of doors much when I walked by this big sliding glass door in the kitchen. There is a deck just outside the door that has railing that is topped by white lattice (oh how I wish I had my camera) and as I walked by I noticed this little bird sitting on the fence looking at me. Well, I thought, it'll be gone when I walk back by, but when I DID, it turned and looked at me again so for a second I stopped and looked at this cute little bird sitting on the fence and was reminded of one of the recent blogs I had read that talked about sitting on fences and as I thought of that story I had recently read I asked the Lord "Is that me Lord? sitting there, afraid to move? Afraid to fly?" And I felt this whisper of a yes in my heart. I all too often just go along with the status quo, even when my heart is YEARNING with the deepest of yearns to change SOMETHING in my life, in me, in the way I do things! Even as I write this I am thinking, I also sit on that fence because I am afraid of the predators that might come along and snatch at me, tear out my feathers or cause damage to me! HMMMMM.....where is that gonna get me? Nowhere!
5. I pulled a new 2010 promise out of the promise box yesterday and it just almost made me laugh! For the second year in a row I have pulled a verse out of Proverbs 8...and once again it is all about wisdom! Holy moly! hahaha! Okay, Lord, so what is it You want to DO in me? I mean it all sounds good and fine but how does rubber meet the road here? And as I have begun to think about it I recognize that the way that I learn is by seeing, doing, touching, talking about it! AHA! So, I could blog what the Lord is speaking to me ie. bible study of sorts and I can make a card a day (okay gonna give myself LOTS of grace with this one) but one that speaks of what I am learning or what the Lord is saying to my heart! WOW! Of course the first question I begin with is, "who is gonna care about this stuff Lord?" and He says to me A-GAIN...Lucy, you do what pleases Me and let Me take care of any details" "oh...ha...thats a good plan Lord"
So, up up and away.... I am going to attempt to move out and be brave, to do something that my very heart is just bursting to do and see what the Lord does...My hope, my expectation, my heart is in His hands and I am wanting to please Him with my words, my obedience to be in His Word and to use my hands to please Him and bring to life some kind of "message"....
I hope you will give me lots and lots of grace and love and prayers as I move into this very scary and yet very creative place!
My 2010 promise:
Proverbs 8:17
I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently will find me. (me in this verse is referring to wisdom)
The title of Proverbs 8? The Excellence of Wisdom...
so, here is my card I made for today. As I asked the Lord what it is I should "say" on my first one and how I should phrase it, this is what I felt I needed to put...
Be Defined By Wisdom...
I so truly want to be defined by wisdom and by what the Lord has planted in me and not by what I see myself as or what I believe is my own intrinsic value. The Lord loves me and has planted so much in my heart over th years and as I have looked at the cocoon that I was given refuge in as a new believer I am so stunned by the amount of good things poured into me, ie? wisdom! As a young believer and a woman who was in un-be-lievable pain and anguish, I was folded into the arms of people who walked beside me and saw what I didn't see, a woman who would grow into herself, a woman who would begin to finally believe that the Lord can do ANYTHING and free ANYONE and they walked along side us as we began to rebuild our lives and cooperate with God in the remaking process. I so want to repay them in kind...no, not by folding them into a cocoon but by building into someone else the deep rich faith of a life with Jesus! I can think of no other greater gift. I will always and forever be grateful to the Lord for those He placed in our lives who taught us so much and as I look at what was I see how MUCH He protected us from! I see now that I need to come to a new place of wisdom. Instead of relying only on the old stuff (which, by the way, is rich and good stuff) I need to learn new stuff, I need a fresh new awakening and reworking. Yep, I want to know the Lord in a whole fresh new way! My prayer for you is that the Lord bring a whole new way of looking at wisdom, of seeing wisdom and understanding wisdom. I pray that He open your eyes to see your life not as one full of broken dreams and promises but one that is full of promise, full of all kinds of wonderful and amazing new adventures. Get off the fence and be like that little bird I saw today, whom, after about 5 minutes of just looking at me, turned as I turned from the window, and flew away. Dream, learn, grow and let wisdom have her way with you!
and for anyone who wants to know what is in the card?
Supplies:
Paper: Kraft paper by Scenic Route
Patterned paper: Scrap Within Reach
Embellishments: Prima Pearls, Mulberry Street Petaloos
Heart Pin: made by Me!
Stamps: Fiskars/Cloud 9, Martha Stewart (butterfly)
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